day 11- how you found out about blogs and why you made one.

well, i first started blogging when xanga was cool. that was LONG time ago. since then, i've really missed writing. it's a good way to get out my thoughts/feelings rather than exploding. though that sometimes still happens! i decided to start blogging again a. because i missed it, and b. it was so much fun catching up on friends' blogs i thought it would be a good way to share my life with them.

also, i am a copycat :)

adrift and at peace

"the goal of any surgery is total recovery. to come out better than you were before. some patients heal quickly and feel immediate relief. for others, the healing happens gradually. and it's not until months, or even years later, that you realize, you don't hurt anymore. so the challenge after any surgery, is to be patient. but if you can make it through the first weeks and months, if you believe that healing is possible, then you can get your life back. but that's a big if."
-grey's anatomy

the end of the year always makes me want to reflect on the past 12 months, as i guess it does to a lot of people. i was catching up on grey's anatomy this afternoon, and this monologue played at the end of it. as always, they're not really talking about surgery, but rather, life. i dont know if it's the time of year, or maybe i'm just pms-ing but hearing these words made me a little emotional. i think they pretty much summed up my year in the most perfect way. 2010 was a GREAT year for me, but it was also a difficult one. there was a lot of loss, a lot of hurt, and a lot of time spent on my own, searching. and as i look back on it, i have to say that i DO believe healing is possible. it's slow, and it takes patience, but it eventually runs it's course. and when you DO finally get to the other side, something beautiful awaits.

days 10 & 11

been so distracted lately, in a great way ;), that i forgot all about blogging.

day 9- songs you listen to when you're happy, sad, bored, hyper, or mad.

my choice of music almost always depends on my mood. (doesn't everyone's? haha) i don't usually use music to change or alter how i'm feeling however. i'm typically pretty comfortable feeling whatever is going and use my music to go with it. so i'm just going to share my favorite as of right now.

jay brannan- an amazing singer/songwriter based in nyc. very mellow, very raw, but sometimes able to find the humor in some difficult subjects. definitely someone worth checking out, even if you don't become obsessed, like me.

*******************************

day 10- another picture of you and your friends

i hope they know i love them <3

day 9- something you're proud of in the past few days

a little cheesy, i know. but i work my damn ass off, and it's nice to be recognized for it. :)

day 8- short term goals for this month

goal setting is always a little hard because even though i ALWAYS have them, if i announce them and they don't follow pan out, then i get pretty grumpy. i'm a bit anal to say the least. but, here they are!

1. make a gingerbread house for the restaurant. we talked about it a LOT last year, but i was really new, and essentially just wasn't ready to add something extra. we ran out of time and i have been thinking about this ALL YEAR LONG, so this is the year! right now the dough is made and sitting in the walk in. tuesday i'll roll it out to the sizes we need and bake it off, and then we are ready to start building!

2. get through my last week of school (for now). i have an exam, and i wanna rock it! i've been studying, practicing, and my hands are literally SORE from kneading bread. i'm ready.

3. slutcracker. and nutcracker. it's december, after all.

4. relax. this probably won't happen until after the holidays. but i have almost all of january off from school, and i plan on spending a lot of time taking care of ME.

...i also plan on spending a lot of time in bed.

day 7- a picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

day 6- your favorite superhero

i know belle isn't a "superhero" in the typical sense, but i was never a superman/wonderwoman/etc fan growing. i ALWAYS loved belle though. when i was younger i loved her because she was a simple girl, was dealt a less than perfect life, and gave up a lot, and still ended up with the prince. and i wanted that for myself. now, as an adult, i realize i still love belle because she was a simple girl, was dealt a less than perfect life, and gave up a lot, and ended up with a beautiful life because SHE made it that way. she found joy in whatever she did because she knew life was a gift. she loved someone who no one else loved because she saw the beauty inside of him. she never tried to change him, and never complained about her circumstances. she stayed true to herself, and because of this she was able to find her 'happily ever after'.

she's also the inspiration for bella's name ;)