day 11- how you found out about blogs and why you made one.

well, i first started blogging when xanga was cool. that was LONG time ago. since then, i've really missed writing. it's a good way to get out my thoughts/feelings rather than exploding. though that sometimes still happens! i decided to start blogging again a. because i missed it, and b. it was so much fun catching up on friends' blogs i thought it would be a good way to share my life with them.

also, i am a copycat :)

adrift and at peace

"the goal of any surgery is total recovery. to come out better than you were before. some patients heal quickly and feel immediate relief. for others, the healing happens gradually. and it's not until months, or even years later, that you realize, you don't hurt anymore. so the challenge after any surgery, is to be patient. but if you can make it through the first weeks and months, if you believe that healing is possible, then you can get your life back. but that's a big if."
-grey's anatomy

the end of the year always makes me want to reflect on the past 12 months, as i guess it does to a lot of people. i was catching up on grey's anatomy this afternoon, and this monologue played at the end of it. as always, they're not really talking about surgery, but rather, life. i dont know if it's the time of year, or maybe i'm just pms-ing but hearing these words made me a little emotional. i think they pretty much summed up my year in the most perfect way. 2010 was a GREAT year for me, but it was also a difficult one. there was a lot of loss, a lot of hurt, and a lot of time spent on my own, searching. and as i look back on it, i have to say that i DO believe healing is possible. it's slow, and it takes patience, but it eventually runs it's course. and when you DO finally get to the other side, something beautiful awaits.

days 10 & 11

been so distracted lately, in a great way ;), that i forgot all about blogging.

day 9- songs you listen to when you're happy, sad, bored, hyper, or mad.

my choice of music almost always depends on my mood. (doesn't everyone's? haha) i don't usually use music to change or alter how i'm feeling however. i'm typically pretty comfortable feeling whatever is going and use my music to go with it. so i'm just going to share my favorite as of right now.

jay brannan- an amazing singer/songwriter based in nyc. very mellow, very raw, but sometimes able to find the humor in some difficult subjects. definitely someone worth checking out, even if you don't become obsessed, like me.

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day 10- another picture of you and your friends

i hope they know i love them <3

day 9- something you're proud of in the past few days

a little cheesy, i know. but i work my damn ass off, and it's nice to be recognized for it. :)

day 8- short term goals for this month

goal setting is always a little hard because even though i ALWAYS have them, if i announce them and they don't follow pan out, then i get pretty grumpy. i'm a bit anal to say the least. but, here they are!

1. make a gingerbread house for the restaurant. we talked about it a LOT last year, but i was really new, and essentially just wasn't ready to add something extra. we ran out of time and i have been thinking about this ALL YEAR LONG, so this is the year! right now the dough is made and sitting in the walk in. tuesday i'll roll it out to the sizes we need and bake it off, and then we are ready to start building!

2. get through my last week of school (for now). i have an exam, and i wanna rock it! i've been studying, practicing, and my hands are literally SORE from kneading bread. i'm ready.

3. slutcracker. and nutcracker. it's december, after all.

4. relax. this probably won't happen until after the holidays. but i have almost all of january off from school, and i plan on spending a lot of time taking care of ME.

...i also plan on spending a lot of time in bed.

day 7- a picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

day 6- your favorite superhero

i know belle isn't a "superhero" in the typical sense, but i was never a superman/wonderwoman/etc fan growing. i ALWAYS loved belle though. when i was younger i loved her because she was a simple girl, was dealt a less than perfect life, and gave up a lot, and still ended up with the prince. and i wanted that for myself. now, as an adult, i realize i still love belle because she was a simple girl, was dealt a less than perfect life, and gave up a lot, and ended up with a beautiful life because SHE made it that way. she found joy in whatever she did because she knew life was a gift. she loved someone who no one else loved because she saw the beauty inside of him. she never tried to change him, and never complained about her circumstances. she stayed true to herself, and because of this she was able to find her 'happily ever after'.

she's also the inspiration for bella's name ;)

day 5- a picture of somewhere you've been

waterbury, vt
beautiful scenery, the mountains, the lake, the sunshine, and the home of the ben and jerry's factory. what more could you want?

day 4- a habit you wish you didn't have

there aren't really any habits that i hate so much that i wish i didn't have them, but i do have one habit that is a bit silly, and i'd probably be better off if i didn't do it.

i play with my hair. a LOT. mostly i like to twirl it around my finger, but i also play with the ends of it, run my fingers through it, put it in a ponytail, take it out...i dont really know why. i guess it feels good? i don't even notice it most of the time until i've already been doing it. i do it on the bus, while watching a movie, reading, petting the dog.

i guess it's not that much of a big deal. i'm sure if someone else was writing this, they'd say they wish i didn't have my farting habit, or my taking pictures of people in awkward moments habit. but i enjoy those too much ;)

day 3- a picture of you and your friends

so i know the title of this day, technically, is supposed to be A picture of you and your friends, but i couldn't narrow it down to one photo simply because there are too many people that have touched my life in a way special enough to be called a 'friend.' which is funny, because i always say even though there are a lot of people in my life, i don't have many friends, because it takes a lot for me to be able to trust and respect someone enough to give them that title. but when i really sat down and started looking through photos i realized that i do, in fact, have a lot of friends. and i am so grateful for the many ways they have shaped my life. so without further ado...


i basically grew up with this gal. middle school, high school, lived together during college, etc. etc. she was my partner in crime for so long, and i love her dearly.


love this four more than anything. we've been through a lot of LIFE stuff together, and even time and distance can't shake the bond we formed all those years ago. and just for fun...a picture of us when we were younger...




spent my first summer in boston with these lovely ladies at camp massachusetts. our lives don't intersect as much as we probably would all like but there's something about that summer has linked us for good.


these beautiful women were two of my very first friends upon moving out here, which is huge when you move across the country alone.




interacting with people you work with is tough. it can be even tougher when you have to live with the people you work with. you get to know each other in a very intimate way. you experience not only a person's work ethic, but also their life ethic, and how they treat others. you see their true colors. working at the wellmet house has been, and still is, a big part of my life in boston. im grateful for the opportunity is has afforded me, and even more grateful for the strong, intelligent people it has allowed me to work alongside for the past three years.



i spend a significant portion of my life at the restaurant and i love it. no friends list would be complete without mentioning these burros, even though they drive me crazy most of the time.


it may seem silly to some to post a picture of your dog when you're supposed to be writing about your friends. but this little baby has changed my life for the better. people always ask if i rescued her, but really, we rescued each other. you can't stay out all night drinking or getting into trouble when there's a sweet face needing you at home. she knows me, and my moods, better than most people. and if you're wondering why my butt looks weird in this photo, it's because i was clenching it. i thought clenching might make it look smaller, but in fact, it made it look flat and wide. hmph.

day 2- the meaning behind your blog name

well,it is obviously a play on the "eat pray love" fame. i've only actually read about half of the book, and have never seen the movie, but it's a phrase i kept hearing over and over and it just stuck in my head. so i changed it up a bit to laugh, bake, love.

laugh, because there is no better feeling. what a beautiful release laughter is, it just takes over your whole body in an amazing way.

bake, because it's what i do. it's how i pour out every emotion that i would otherwise have difficulty sharing. i love it even when i'm burning myself or filtering fryer oil.

love, because what good is life without love?

day 1- a Picture and 15 Interesting Facts

this is me in my kitchen cooking some stuff for an after-thanksgiving dinner celebration with some friends. food+cooking+friends=happy! which leads me to my first fun-fact.

1. nothing makes me happier than a glass of wine with friends. and dessert.

2. i love love LOVE summer. i love the warmth of the sun on my skin, late summer nights and the rush of the ocean. that being said...

3. new england winters are starting to grow on me. there's something beautiful and haunting about a snow fall and the way the city lights reflect off the snow. i'm sure i'll be eating my words in about a month when i'm shoveling.

4. i'm clumsy. i understand that this is not an 'interesting' fact, nor is it a new fact. but it's such a prominent part of my life that i had to mention it.

5. i have an 'other' job. i run a group home for crazy people. we use live-in staff to destigmatize mental illness. what this really means is that we live with crazy people.

6. i like to put vaseline on my feet at night and cover them with socks.

7. socks are the only thing i wear to bed.

8. i keep a spare pair of underwear and socks in my work bag. i've been stranded too many times without them, and it is NOT comfortable to work (aka sweat) without socks or underwear.

9. i absolutely hate when people type. like. this. it just doesn't read very well, and plus, it's lame.

10. i also hate when people say 'lol' or 'btw' or anything of that nature in a regular conversation. though it's a good way to sound completely uneducated, if that's your goal.

11. i am addicted to facebook. it's kind of disgusting, actually. my phone battery wastes away every day because i'm constantly on facebook. i get up to use the bathroom most nights around 4 am, and i can't fall back asleep after unless i see what people are up to on facebook. except that people are not up to ANYTHING on facebook, because it's 4am!

12. kids drive me absolutely nuts. WHY are they always screaming and WHY are they always dirty? yech.

13. i LOVE my dog more than anything. yes, she is spoiled and neurotic. and yes, she will always be cuter than your dog.

14. my friends mean the world to me. i couldn't make it through this life without them.

15. as much as i love my friends, i am still my favorite person. my alone time is priceless.

30 day challenge

it seems a bunch of 30 day blog challenges are going around lately. i havent been blogging as much lately and wanted to jump on the challenge bandwagon to get back into the swing of writing, but most of the ones i've come across seem pretty cheesy. "what's your favorite hobby?" blaahhhh...i mean, come on. i'm not 5. but then i came across this one and thought it was actually pretty interesting, particularly the ones that prompt you to write a letter, talk about your goals, and reveal what you think about your friends. i need another "to do" in my life like i need another hole in my head, but i thought i'd give it a go anyway! here's a list of what you'll be hearing from me in the next 30 days. i know, i know. so exciting.

Day 1- A recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself.
Day 2 - The meaning behind your blog name.
Day 3 -A picture of you and your friends.
Day 4 - A habit that you wish you didn't have.
Day 5 - A picture of somewhere you've been.
Day 6 - Your favorite Superhero and why.
Day 7 - A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you.
Day 8 - Short term goals for this month and why.
Day 9 - Something you're proud of in the past few days.
Day 10 - Songs you listen to when you are happy, sad, bored, hyper, mad.
Day 11 - Another picture of you and your friends.
Day 12 - How you found out about blogs and why you made one.
Day 13 - A letter to someone who has hurt you recently.
Day 14 - A picture of you and your family.
Day 15 - Put your iPod on shuffle; first 10 songs that play.
Day 16 - Another picture of yourself.
Day 17 - Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why.
Day 18 - Plans/Dreams/Goals you have.
Day 19 - Nicknames you have; why do you have them?
Day 20 - Someone you see yourself marrying/being with in the future.
Day 21 - A picture of something that makes you happy.
Day 22 - What makes you different from everyone else?
Day 23 - Something you crave a lot.
Day 24 - A letter to your parents.
Day 25 - What I would find in your purse.
Day 26 - What you think about your friends.
Day 27 - Why are you doing this 30 day challenge?
Day 28 - A picture of you in the last year and now, how have you changed since then?
Day 29 - In this past month what have you learned?
Day 30 - Who are you?

fall

haven't been posting much lately for two reasons- 1, things are going well, and i don't have much to complain about! :) and 2, i'm busy!! however, yesterday was veteran's day, which allowed me a free day, which was amazing. fall is just so unbelievably beautiful here. its such a tease, when we all know that it's followed by a crazy winter. but anyway, my friend and i decided to forgo our mfa-dessert plans and go for a hike instead. we took bella. she peed everywhere. we peed too. it's good for the earth.


little bella starting off the hike :)



through the trees you can see one of the many flags flying in honor of our veterans.









the bridge totally reminded me of dawson's creek!


my dad, in the army <3

remember that

so actually, i'm not much of a jessica simpson fan, and i can't stand watching her perform live (what is up with the facial expressions?!), but i heard this song on pandora the other day and it's been stuck in my head ever since. apparently it's pretty old, but it has a timeless message, one that i'm thankful to have learned yearrrrssss ago (im old), and find it so sad that so many girls don't seem to get it. play the video, hear the song, listen to the lyrics. maybe just close your eyes so you don't have to watch her while you listen?

wordless wednesday

hidden art. the sequel.

back to central square today to check out more of this art i found a couple weeks ago. i did a little research and discovered the artist ritsuko taho. the info i found said that she did this installation, entitled "multicultural manifestos" to explore the, "intersection between public spaces and private thought".

central square is such an active, eclectic space. i mentioned before that this particular space is where the homeless typically gather, especially at night, as it contains several large benches (un)ideal for sleeping. in that sense, it seems that this is the perfect place for manifestos. bold statements of hopes and dreams nestled amongst a place that typically reeks of hopelessness and despair.

this is just heartbreaking. i hope this parent got what they wanted.





the foreign ones strike me as more beautiful and more painful than the others. that distance can be empowering, or devastating.

that's the cool thing about dreams. sometimes you don't know what they are. sometimes when you let go of what you thought you wanted, you find something even more amazing.

and i'll leave you with that to ponder.

who ya gonna call?...ghostbusters!

i am here today to tell a tale of the misadventures that we like to call 'my social life'.

last week i went out with a guy who we'll call bob. bob and i have run into each other a few times at a mutual friends' house. bob is a little boring. he works in the financial district (there's only so much small talk you can make about insurance), is from the midwest (nowhere), and he has two cats (oh dear god..). but bob is nice enough, polite, and persistent. and, well, it's fall, it's getting colder, and it's nice to have a cuddle buddy around when the snow starts to fall, so when he called me up and asked me to dinner, i said, 'sure'.

friday night arrives, i've been working all day, my hair's a little flat from wearing my sexy checkered mccormick's hat at the restaurant all day, and i'm slightly sweaty, but i'm not really trying to impress bob so i change my clothes, slap on some deodorant, and walk through the park to... MOOO!

SCORE! i have been wanting to go to mooo for quite some time now, and i figured the food would make up for the lack of conversation i was anticipating. (sidebar: i was totally right. the food at mooo is phenomenal! what can i say about a perfectly cooked ribeye, and asparagus with creamy hollandaise? i was full about halfway through but i knew if i stopped eating i would regret it...) so, fast forward through dinner (because it WAS a bit on the dull side), and bob asks if i want to come over and "watch a movie".

we all know what "watching a movie" really entails. i quickly debate in my head the pros and cons of "watching a movie" with bob, and decide that since i have enough wine in my system, that i wouldn't mind "watching a movie", if he'll drive me home first to let out the bella. he doesn't mind (guess he's really looking forward to the "movie"), so we quickly pop on over to my house and then back to his apartment to start that "movie".

we get back to his place and he starts yapping about his halloween costume. i vaguely remember discussing halloween during dinner, but don't recall the specifics. i'm about to ask him what his costume is, but he's disappeared into his bedroom saying he'll be right back.

he stays in there, while i stand awkwardly in the kitchen. for fifteen minutes. i'm simultaneously wondering if he thinks i'm going to follow him in there to start the "movie", wondering if i have time to pee before he comes back out, and wondering if i should just leave and meet up with some friends downtown. but then i hear his door opening back.

and.

he walks out in full ghostbusters garb. complete with the backpack thingy and hose attachment that they use to suck up the ghosts.

and he is humming the theme song.

i stare for a full minute, wondering if this somehow a nightmare, or a hallucination (i'm not THAT drunk am i?!). he continues to talk about the suit, apparently him and three friends have been planning this for months (this means there are MORE of them...), and he's totally pumped up about wearing it out on halloween.

...ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!?? how the hell is THIS what i ended up with on a friday night?

i mean really, there has to be something better for me out there. i don't even LIKE halloween. or ghostbusters. ugh.

needless to say, there was not going to be any "movie watching" happening that night. or ever.

fortune cookies

let me preface this post by stating that all of these fortunes did not come from this past week alone. :)







isn't that the truth.

hope everyone has a good week :)